My Giants

Saw Facing the Giants Friday night. Nailed home some points that I really needed to hear. I've been doing a lot of, "God, what am I doing here?" lately.

Life made sense when I was studying music and working with kids. I'm utterly confident about where I'm supposed to be for the next twelve years (after this enlistment, I'm positive about where I'm being led) - and utterly baffled about WHY I'm supposed to be there. Things make sense when I'm in the Midwest, and in the woods, and with my family. Things make sense when I'm using talents we know I'm good at. Between not being around kids for six years, not being around proper woodland for five, and seeing my family sporadically for twelve, something here doesn't look a whole lot like MY life.

So, that raises the question, am I still going to give it to Him when it doesn't make sense?

Concept that isn't exactly broadcasted but just clicked while watching, that I've been trying to articulate for over a year now - what matters most when building this family isn't going to be that you're so solid that you can avoid any crisis. What matters most is that in any crisis, your first response is to go to God first.

So, maybe, that's what I'm supposed to be training on for the next few adventures. Going to Him when I'm broken, and trusting Him when it doesn't seem to make sense.