Bible Study

I've probably mentioned this about Adam before, but his parents alternate between being missionaries and pastors. When they're pastors, they're taking the marriage cases that are harder than what any of the other pastors know how to handle. Adam's grown up in this environment, but he wasn't really living God-focused until a few years ago.

I mention this to try to explain a little bit of what it's like being around him. I've said that his kids are going to have an amazing inheritance because of what he's learned from his parents. He's absolutely set on how God's going to lead, he makes an effort to find something to love in everyone, he's got a nearly perfect record on military things, and his big pet peeve is people trying to spackle up their lives at church (because we're supposed to be able to be real with the believers close to us - if we can't, it's a failure on somebody's end).

Occasionally, being around him drives me nuts.

Most of the time, though, he's one of my best friends. So, I got to hear this story.

There's a small Bible study that goes on (or went on) in the main lounge of his barracks. Adam's not usually there, but he was walking back one night with the guy who leads it. He's another student, barely older than me, just stepped up when it became apparent that there wasn't anything at this end of the base (we're the two furthest barracks - about a twenty-minute walk from the chapel if you're booking it), and he's been working on leading. And his heart's there, but he's struggling. Really struggling.

And at some point, he looked at Adam, actually tears in his eyes, and demanded, "Why aren't YOU there? You know this stuff! We need you!" And Adam was actually knocked speechless.

Tends to be how I'm feeling about a lot of this. Still, the only things I really feel at all qualified for involve kids (if you get cut off from music for six months, you've got some work to do before you can perform again). Every other skill I have, it's one where I'm ready and willing to help, but I can also think of a friend who's better at this, and would get the job done better. Not a down-on-self thing, but it's about getting the work done. I will work UNDER my friend, no problem - but they're more experienced, better at this - I'm on this because it needs to get done. And while I can't say it out loud, I still have that echo in here - turning to my friend, almost on the verge of tears, "Why aren't YOU here? You know how to do this better than I do! We need you!"

I'm still going to show up. Always. And I suppose you can argue that that's more helpful, willingness to work and learn over aptitude without willingness, but it just feels so much smaller. I KNOW someone who can do this.